Holmes chuckled and wriggled in his chair, as was his habit when in
high spirits
“It is a little off the beaten track, isn’t it?” said he
Wilson, off you go at scratch and tell us all about
yourself, your household, and the effect which this advertisement had
upon your fortunes
You will first make a note, Doctor, of the paper
and the date.”

“It is _The Morning Chronicle_ of April 27, 1890
Just two months ago.”

“Very good
Wilson?”

“Well, it is just as I have been telling you, Mr
Sherlock Holmes,”
said Jabez Wilson, mopping his forehead; “I have a small pawnbroker’s
business at Coburg Square, near the City
It’s not a very large affair,
and of late years it has not done more than just give me a living
“His name is Vincent Spaulding, and he’s not such a youth, either
I should not wish a smarter assistant, Mr
Holmes;
and I know very well that he could better himself and earn twice what I
am able to give him
But, after all, if he is satisfied, why should I
put ideas in his head?”

“Why, indeed
You seem most fortunate in having an _employé_ who comes
under the full market price
It is not a common experience among
employers in this age
I don’t know that your assistant is not as
remarkable as your advertisement.”

“Oh, he has his faults, too,” said Mr
“Never was such a fellow
for photography
Snapping away with a camera when he ought to be
improving his mind, and then diving down into the cellar like a rabbit
into its hole to develop his pictures
That is his main fault, but on
the whole he’s a good worker
There’s no vice in him.”

“He is still with you, I presume?”

“Yes, sir
He and a girl of fourteen, who does a bit of simple cooking
and keeps the place clean—that’s all I have in the house, for I am a
widower and never had any family
We live very quietly, sir, the three
of us; and we keep a roof over our heads and pay our debts, if we do
nothing more
“The first thing that put us out was that advertisement
Spaulding, he
came down into the office just this day eight weeks, with this very
paper in his hand, and he says:

“‘I wish to the Lord, Mr
Wilson, that I was a red-headed man.’

“‘Why that?’ I asks
“‘Why,’ says he, ‘here’s another vacancy on the League of the
Red-headed Men
It’s worth quite a little fortune to any man who gets
it, and I understand that there are more vacancies than there are men,
so that the trustees are at their wits’ end what to do with the money
If my hair would only change colour, here’s a nice little crib all
ready for me to step into.’

“‘Why, what is it, then?’ I asked
Holmes, I am a very
stay-at-home man, and as my business came to me instead of my having to
go to it, I was often weeks on end without putting my foot over the
door-mat
In that way I didn’t know much of what was going on outside,
and I was always glad of a bit of news
“‘Have you never heard of the League of the Red-headed Men?’ he asked
with his eyes open
“‘Never.’

“‘Why, I wonder at that, for you are eligible yourself for one of the
vacancies.’

“‘And what are they worth?’ I asked
“‘Tell me all about it,’ said I
“‘Well,’ said he, showing me the advertisement, ‘you can see for
yourself that the League has a vacancy, and there is the address where
you should apply for particulars
As far as I can make out, the League
was founded by an American millionaire, Ezekiah Hopkins, who was very
peculiar in his ways
From all I hear it is splendid pay
and very little to do.’

“‘But,’ said I, ‘there would be millions of red-headed men who would
apply.’

“‘Not so many as you might think,’ he answered
‘You see it is really
confined to Londoners, and to grown men
This American had started from
London when he was young, and he wanted to do the old town a good turn
Then, again, I have heard it is no use your applying if your hair is
light red, or dark red, or anything but real bright, blazing, fiery
red
Vincent Spaulding seemed to know so
much about it that I thought he might prove useful, so I just ordered
him to put up the shutters for the day and to come right away with me
He was very willing to have a holiday, so we shut the business up and
started off for the address that was given us in the advertisement
“I never hope to see such a sight as that again, Mr
From
north, south, east, and west every man who had a shade of red in his
hair had tramped into the city to answer the advertisement
Fleet
Street was choked with red-headed folk, and Pope’s Court looked like a
coster’s orange barrow
I should not have thought there were so many in
the whole country as were brought together by that single
advertisement
Every shade of colour they were—straw, lemon, orange,
brick, Irish-setter, liver, clay; but, as Spaulding said, there were
not many who had the real vivid flame-coloured tint
When I saw how
many were waiting, I would have given it up in despair; but Spaulding
would not hear of it
How he did it I could not imagine, but he pushed
and pulled and butted until he got me through the crowd, and right up
to the steps which led to the office
He said a few words to each candidate as he came up,
and then he always managed to find some fault in them which would
disqualify them
Getting a vacancy did not seem to be such a very easy
matter, after all
However, when our turn came the little man was much
more favourable to me than to any of the others, and he closed the door
as we entered, so that he might have a private word with us
